the smartest kid on earf

My son's lucky. God gave him all the smarts in the world. Of course he doesn't know everything. God had to leave some for the not smart kids to know. So most kids are smart but he's the smartest. He's like the smartest kid on the whole English island. People on the other island speak Spanish so there might be a few smart Spanish kids. Nobody knows what kind of speaking they do on other islands.

Things he knows that prove he's the smartest kid:

1. Nobody knows why they are smart. They just are. Like him.

2. People have different smarts. God has different smarts and he gives one to everyone. Except him. God gave him more smarts than anybody.

3. People have blood to hold up their bones. And there is a special machine in your bones that makes you talk. And God has a big sheet in Heaven that is kinda skin-y and he covers your blood and bones with skin. Then you come alive and God puts you in your mommy's tummy. And God makes little babies in the tummies of girl babies and when that baby girl gets to be an adult the tiny baby grows bigger and comes out.

4. He doesn't cry at school. He's too smart for that. When he was very new at school, he was shy but he didn't cry.

5. He's smart because he's really really good at building Legos.

6. He realized that he renembers his original fourth birthday when he got cars. He's smart because he's got a really good renembery.

So I guess we'll be working on humility for the next few years. You know, "humility" as in "Do you humility with your grandma? No, she lives at her house." Humility is like living with your family. I'm not making this stuff up, folks. He's the smartest kid on Earf.